Cohen and Vaillant Promise a New Old Age

Recently I read books by George Vaillant and Gene Cohen.  Both of these writers are psychiatrists who do research on aging and developmental stage theory.  I find them fascinating, partly because I am old.   What do I have to look forward to?  After all, I am already old. 

But get a grip, folks, things are looking up.  Somebody has been keeping a secret about getting old.  Retiring is a whole new world.  Gene Cohen reports new stages in old age that nobody has told us about in his book THE MATURE MIND.  And they are wonderful!

Cohen’s first new stage for old people is called Midlife Re-evaluation.  Midlife Crisis has lost its snap because most people don’t have a crisis.  They re-evaluate where they are and where they want to go somewhere around 55 or 60.  Maybe younger, maybe older, but the realigning of their priorities and goals gives them a push for the last half of their lives.

By the time you are nearing retirement, you get your second wind.  You see as you near that time that there is more to life than winding down.  You have energy and zest you thought belonged to the younger generation.  You may approach life differently—more thought and purpose, more joy and fun—and use it better than you did in the past.  You may remember Grandma Moses who began painting at 77.  I opened a catering business when I retired at 60.  You may do something you never did before because now there is no one to say you can’t; there is no reason not to try.  Success is not the goal—it is a matter of enjoying the experience.  This is called the Liberation Phase.

Cohen calls the third phase Summing Up.  This is the time to see what your life has meant.  Volunteerism is very popular with the older crowd.  Giving back becomes a motto.  Mentoring to pass on skills and information becomes a tradition.  Some people begin the study of genealogy or write their memoirs.  I have always loved to write so I get to blog and it’s free.  I also enjoy genealogy—I call it visiting “with dead relatives.”  I get regular calls from grandchildren who need a class project about their ancestors. 

Cohen labels the last phase the Encore Phase meaning “again” as well as “continuing.”  It may begin in the seventies and continue through the eighties and nineties.  The later phases wax and wane in waves during this time.  Generativity which may start during the forties may come back with renewed urgency.  Generativity is the drive to teach someone younger what you have learned, to pass on knowledge and skill in a profession or sport.  Becoming the Keeper of the Culture allows you to share the family story through genealogy or family myths to a wider audience.  Being mentor to an organization instead of just a family member instills the story for society’s benefit. 

Vaillant’s book AGING WELL points out the impressive importance of the Generativity stage.  He emphasizes that mentoring or passing on your knowledge and skill is the best indicator of successful aging.  Erik Erikson’s Stages of Ego Development lists Generativity vs. Stagnation important in adulthood, and the life skill we develop in this process is care.  It is not difficult to see the connection between Generativity and successful aging; 

·         It requires contact with others. 

·         It is intellectually demanding. 

·         It is goal oriented.

·         It is reinforcing to both parties.

I urge you to look at aging in a new way.  Cohen and Vaillant emphasize that the brain never stops learning.  Let me repeat that:  The brain never stops learning.  There are new things to look forward to and you have not yet scratched the surface.  Enjoy!